Dating the Espada!
by Aoiteru-san
Summary: The Espada living in Karakura town, and what? They're dating the Espada? Oh no, this can't be good. Parings: Grimmichi , Ulquihime , SzaIshi .. And RenRuki at some parts! Enjoy! Rated T for now, Grimmjow might change that
1. The worst housewarming, ever

**Okay, this is my first fan fiction on this account.. I keep forgetting my passwords A.. But I'm determined to remember this one. Anyway, this is my story.. I hope you enjoy~**

* * *

Humming a tune to herself, Inoue trotted down the narrow sidewalks of Karakura Town. Accompanied by her boyfriend of 2 months, Ulquiorra Cifer, who wore a bleak and expressionless face. But she was used to it, that was how he was, she still loved him regardless.

Her auburn locks flowing gracefully behind her as her tune continued, a smile on her cherubic features. Her left hand intertwined with the hand of Ulquiorra. His hand only being the same color as hers because of the gigai he'd currently been inhabiting. He sighed, wishing that they could just have a peaceful and quiet walk home. But he was used to it, that was how she was, and he still loved her regardless.

"On'na, you have yet to tell me where we are headed." Ulquiorra's tone flat as his cold green eyes shifted almost robotically to land on the girl who looked over and up to him, her slate eyes full of life. "We are going to Ishida-kun's house today~!" she mused as she continued to pull him down the street along with her.

"Okay, and why is it that we are paying the Quincy a visit?" he asked again, his eyes still hard on her. "Because silly, we are celebrating him and Szayel moving into their own apartment!" she began her hand slightly tightening around his in excitement. "After 2 and a half months of seeing each other, Szayel is moving from Hueco Mundo to buy a new place to live with him!" she couldn't help but find it all to be so romantic and sweet. Maybe because Ishida was constantly feeding her information pertaining to his relationship with the pink haired espada. She had even been the one to encourage Ishida in asking Szayel to move into a new home with him.

"So what does this have to do with us? I'm pretty sure they can celebrate without our help." he stated, he would much rather like to remain back at their own apartment, even if he wouldn't be doing anything. He really didn't want to go see Szayel either. The two weren't what one would call 'friends'.

"Nonsense silly! Kurosaki-kun and Grimmjow-kun are going to be there too!" her hand tightened more as she sped up, Ulquiorra almost tripping over his own feet trying to keep up.

He suppressed a groan. Dealing with Szayel was one thing, but at least he was intelligent. Grimmjow on the other hand, was a complete imbecile, and he was beyond irritating.

"Can we go home On'na?" he asked, he really didn't want to go, why couldn't they just enjoy this Sunday afternoon at home? "Of course not, I promised Ishida-kun I would come!" she protested, still pulling him along as he dragged his feet.

_Then maybe you can go by yourself and I can go back home. _He thought to himself, but he dared not say it out loud. He didn't want to see the girl get upset.

Suddenly the girl stopped, standing in front of a building "Okay, I think it's this complex," she said, "269 if I'm not mistaken. Come on Ulquiorra-kun, let's check~!" she squeaked as she ran up the steps of the place, dragging him along.

When they found the room, Inoue leaned out a cautious hand and tapped the door lightly. After a moment in silence there was finally a sound of the door opening. Standing in the doorway, Szayel looked down on the two.

"Ulquiorra, and Orihime-san." he stated simply, but before he could say anything, Ishida had already come and pushed him out of the way. "Szayel I told you not to touch the door!" he shouted at him before turning to give his friend a soft smile. "Inoue-san." he nodded, his eyes shifted over to the former quatro. "Ulquiorra." his voice sounded a bit displeased, but he would keep his manners around Inoue. "How are you two?" he asked, his question more directed towards Inoue.

"Maybe you should invite them in, rather than trying to have a conversation while they're outside." Szayel mused, he'd already made his way to the couch that was already put in place in the far corner, his legs crossed.

"He's right Ishida-kun! We aren't strangers~" she mused as she slipped past the male, her chest clipping the door hinge. "Oww!" she fell to the floor, her arms over her breasts, Ulquiorra stood from outside, watching her in an unamused fashion.

"Are you alright Inoue-san?" Ishida asked, leaving the doorway and moving to her side. Allowing Ulquiorra to slip in with ease. He already wanted to leave, but still he knew he'd have to stay.

"H-hai, I'm fine Ishida-kun!" Inoue nodded, pushing herself off the ground. After getting situated with herself she looked around. It seemed that they'd unpacked everything in the course of two days. "So are we first?" she asked, her eyes still wandering around.

"It appears that way," Ishida began, "However, I expected Kurosaki and Grimmjow to arrive first." he adjusted his glasses slightly. "I can only wonder what those idiots are doing right now."

* * *

"Grimmjow! Hurry up or we'll be late!" Ichigo banged on the door of the bathroom, his lover who was inside, doing kami knows what.

"Oh shut th' fuck up. Pinky and four eyes can wait. I'm not going anywhere looking like a fuckin' pansy." Grimmjow replied, he was in the mirror, adjusting his collar constantly. Every inch of him had to be perfect. He was going to be in a house with Ulquiorra and Szayel? If he was going to spend the night getting on them, he had to make sure he had everything intact so they had nothing to get back at him on.

"Grimmjow, I'm pretty sure you look fine, but seriously, you're just wasting time." the Ginger was becoming annoyed, and he knew that if they got there late, someone [Ishida] was going to comment on it.

"What the fuck ever, I'll take my sweet ass time if I want. Don't fucking rush me Berry." shouted Grimmjow. His screaming caused his collar to shift slightly out of place. "Damn," he began to fiddle with it once more.

Outside the bathroom, Ichigo groaned .. "GRIMMJOW!"

* * *

"Grimmjow is most likely holding the poor boy up." commented Szayel from across the room, although his nose had already been stuck into a book, he could still hear the conversation going on around him. Ulquiorra sat near him, Inoue had moved to sit right next to Ulquiorra and Ishida, being the only one still standing, slowly moved to sit next to Szayel.

"So what do we do til they get here?" Ishida asked, his gaze on Szayel, who wasn't paying him any mind. "Oh Oh!" Inoue raised her hand high in the air, waving it about. "Uh, yes Inoue-san?" Ishida raised an eyebrow. "We could play truth or dare!" she squealed. "No." came the simultaneous reply from all the males in the room. "B-but.. Okay." Inoue pouted, seeing that her offer had been turned down so quickly.

After about 45 minutes, Szayel shut his book loudly and tossed it on the coffee table in front of him. "Well this is rather boring, ne?" he asked to no one in particular. Ishida had his head rested on Szayel's lap, and Ulquiorra had been playing with strands of Inoue's hair.

"Very." the girls lips pursed. "Hey." she started, moving away from Ulquiorra. The other three's eyes fixed on her, they knew that she was about to suggest something. "What if you two gave us a tour of the house?" Inoue smiled.

"That doesn't sound too bad." Ishida said, pushing himself up and off the couch. "Okay, we can do th-" He was cut off by the sound of the doorbell ringing.

"It must be them!" Inoue shouted, running to answer the door herself. Opening it she was faced with the two people everyone had spent nearly and hour waiting for.

"Kurosaki-kun, Grimmjow-kun!" Inoue mused pulling them both in. Ishida who glared at them both, just shook his head. "It took you both long enough." he grumbled.

"Hey, it ain't my fault." Grimmjow said, moving his arm up to rest his elbow on Ichigo's shoulder. "Ahem, I beg to differ." Ichigo commented, shrugging the elbow off. "But that's not important, what's important is that we are here, and by the looks of it, we haven't missed much."

"Ichigo's right, the fuck were you all doing in here before we got here?" Grimmjow spat, his arms now crossed over his chest.

"We were waiting for you two to arrive!" Inoue said, "But Ishida-kun and Szayel-kun were just about to give us a tour, so come on! Ishida-kun, Szayel-kun, lead the way!" she shouted happily.

Szayel pushed himself off the couch slowly, not even bothering to take a look at Grimmjow, who's loud voice already began to irritate him. "Certainly." he stated simply as he walked off, followed by Ishida and the others who weren't as excited as Inoue was.

The house wasn't anything too spectacular, a fully equipped kitchen, a bathroom in the hall next to what would become Szayel's makeshift lab, another bedroom that would become Ishida's sewing room, and at the end of the hall, another bedroom that contained a bathroom. The bedroom that the two would share.

When they entered, the room was bleak and there were boxes everywhere, mainly with Ishida's stuff. The walls were pale white and the floor was a chocolate brown wood. A bed big enough for two sat in the center, and there were two windows on either side of it.

Grimmjow cackled and sat on the bed, and made a face at Szayel. "I'm guessing this is where the majority of the fucking will take place?"

Inoue, and Ishida's faces turned a bright red, Ichigo did a literal face palm, and Ulquiorra just stared at Grimmjow blankly. Szayel on the other hand just smirked. "I don't think that's any of your business Grimmjow."

Grimmjow just smiled more, "Oh really? You're not gonna tell me about your sex life Szayel? Why not? I have no problem with sharing information about mine. I mean every night, I make Ichigo scream like a little bitch until he cums."

"GRIMMJOW!" Ichigo shouted for the umpteenth time this evening, his face now an angry red from embarrassment.

"What? Che, you're acting like it ain't true." Grimmjow now turned his gaze to his boyfriend. "I mean it's not my fault I like ramming into that tight ass of-" "OKAY!" Ishida shouted, becoming annoyed. Inoue who hid her face into Ulquiorra's chest, unable to believe that Ichigo had actually taken part in such actions.

"Why don't we go back to the living room?" Ulquiorra suggested, glaring at Grimmjow who'd upset Inoue. "I agree," Szayel said, adjusting his glasses in irritation. Turning, he was the first to head back to the living room. He was kind of upset, the dammed Quincy hadn't even let Szayel touch him in over 4 weeks. The reason was unknown to him, but he didn't care. He would 'deflower' him in due time.

He could hear the footsteps of the others getting gradually closer to him. He took his seat back on the couch, and watched them as they entered. Ishida sitting down next to Szayel again, Inoue and Ulquiorra sitting next to them, her head still in his chest, Grimmmjow sitting next to them, and Ichigo plopping himself next to the blue haired man, obviously upset.

"What an interesting evening." Ulquiorra's flat voice hung in the air. Everyone refusing to speak. Grimmjow had single-handedly ruined the entire evening for everyone.

"Maybe we should go.." Ichigo said, feeling as if it was his fault for bringing along that menace in the first place.

"No…That would defeat the purpose of gathering you all here." Ishida adjusted his glasses and looked over at Szayel, who was just lost in his own thoughts.

"Szayel, this is our house now, and we are being terrible hosts if you ask me." his face serious. Szayel just stared back at him, with an aloof gaze that just made the Quincy upset. Ishida's eyes narrowed at the pink haired man, waiting for a response.

"Szayel…" Ishida spoke again. Still he was only met with that blank stare. "Szayel Aporro…" his voice now showing his irritation. He would nearly explode if he wasn't met with an answer. "SZAYEL APORRO GRANZ I AM NOT TALKING TO A PINK WALL.! ANSWER ME!"

Everyone's eyes turned to the Quincy in astonishment, Ichigo and Grimmjow busted into laughter, Inoue was shocked, and Ulquiorra just shook his head in slight amusement.

"Damn, poor Quincy, he let pinky move in and he doesn't even know how much of an ass he really is," Grimmjow was probably laughing the hardest. Ichigo laughing because the Quincies face was as red as can be. "Don't have a baby Ishida." he chuckled which made the other even more upset.

"I'm not the one having hardcore sex every night, so you'll be having one before I do." Ishida replied his glare now fixed on the Ginger, who's laughing stopped and was replaced with a deep crimson blush. "M-MEN CAN'T GET PREGNANT YOU DUMBASS!" Ichigo shouted back, trying not to become flustered with himself.

"You're a soul reaper, hollow, and a full bringer. You might be the first man to get pregnant." Grimmjow looked at his lover with a grin, before tackling him to the floor.

"Why don't I plant my seed in you right here, then when you have my kids, I can tell them the story every night before they go to bed~" he mused in the Gingers ear. Which sent a pleasurable shudder down his spine, but the words made his face turn white. "GRIMMJOW GET OFF THAT ISN'T FUNNY!" he shouted, squirming under him.

"Please refrain from trying to fornicate with your significant other on my floor, Grimmjow," spoke Szayel finally from the couch. "It's disgusting really."

"Fuck off Pinky, I'll fuck berry whenever I want.. If you don't want to see it, then take four-eyes to the back and show him a good time alright? Stop bein' such a chockablock," growled Grimmjow from the floor.

Ulquiorra leaned over behind Ishida, whispering something to Szayel, "If you want himto stop, just pour water on him. As a feline, it should irritate him." Upon hearing this, Szayel's lips curled into a sly grin as he stood from the couch. "Excuse me for a moment." he said, walking out of the room and into the bathroom. Coming back in with a glass of water in hand he stood over the previous Sexta. "Grimmjow, I will ask you one more time to stop what you are doing." Szayel said calmly, almost polite.

"I'll say this one more time Pinky," Grimmjow began. "Fuck. Off."

"Tsk Tsk, wrong answer." Szayel didn't say anything more, he just turned the glass, pouring the contents all over the blue haired mans back.

"FUCK FUCK FUCK!" Grimmjow literally hissed before jumping over into the corner and out of harms way, Ichigo was caught by a bit of the water, but nevertheless happy to be from under his grasp. He heaved a sigh in relief. "Thanks Szayel." he panted.

"Don't thank me, I didn't do it for you." Szayel stated simply as he held a hand out for the other. Ichigo was reluctant, but he ended up taking the Scientists bony hand in his. Szayel effortlessly lifted him off the ground, letting go of his hand he dusted it off on the jeans that he'd borrowed from Ishida until he could buy his own clothing. With a huff, he went and returned to the couch.

Ichigo looked over at Grimmjow, who was glaring daggers at Szayel from the corner. Ichigo chuckled.

"I think I just got a new way to keep the Blueberry in check."

* * *

**-End Chapter one- **


	2. Monday A Fun Day P1

**Woo! Chapter two! I think I should start titling these? Yeah…**

* * *

**Chapter Two: Monday = A Fun Day! [Part one]**

* * *

It was a Monday, Grimmjow's least favorite day of the week. Everything was slow, boring, and nothing seemed to move fast enough, save the moments when he was actually enjoying himself.

He'd rather stay in bed all day, only getting up when he had to eat or use the bathroom. But living in a house with Ichigo, he rarely did anything like that.

It couldn't have been two minutes to six when the Ginger teen rose from his slumber, and like always, Grimmjow pretended not to be phased by it. Even if the others movements woke him up, he would pretend to be asleep, trying to cherish every moment of sleep that he would get.

Around 6:30, when Ichigo was finally finished readying himself for the morning, he came back into the room and hopped on the bed. "Grimmjow, it's time to wake up."

And as usual, the other would pretend to be in a sleep so deep that he couldn't hear the other. But Ichigo wasn't an idiot. And he knew how to handle this. "Okay, fine~" he mused before scooting himself over to the edge of the bed and standing. "Lay in bed all day, you lazy." he left the room and made a beeline for the kitchen.

About ten minutes later, the smell of food hung in the air, the scent traveling until it found its way to the couples bedroom where Grimmjow slept more than peacefully. Upon smelling it, his eyes snapped open and he snapped up, almost looking like some kind of animated character. He wiped the sleep out of his eyes and pulled himself out of the bed. Wasting little to no time to get to the kitchen.

"Works every time" Ichigo muttered to himself as his lover entered the kitchen, trying to give off a groggy appearance. He'd walk past Ichigo and into the dining area right outside of the kitchen. Yawning, the other would sit in one of the two chairs at the table. Slumping back he tried to keep his eyes open, for the sake of food.

Finishing what he was doing, Ichigo entered the dining room, but with one bowl and plate in hand. Much to Grimmjow's surprise, who thought that the plate and bowl were for him, until the other sat down in front of him and begin eating.

He sat there, mouth gaping at the Ginger, who happily ate the meal, not even stopping once to offer the other anything. He sat like that til the other finished, still unable to believe what had just occurred. It finally hit him when the other left the dining room and placed his dishes in the sink, only peeking back in to ask "You mind doing those for me before I get home Grimm? Thanks~".

"That fucking bastard." Grimmjow sat at the table alone, tired and hungry. He knew instantly that he was tricked into waking up, and now that he had, he knew there was no way he was getting back to bed. His eyes narrowed and he continued to grumble things under his breath. "I hope you get fucking hit by a car on your way to school, you strawberry bitch."

* * *

"Ahh, Ulquiorra-kun~" Inoue exclaimed as she was having her hair put into one braid going down her back, with her bangs still hanging about her face. Holding a mirror up in front of her, she found herself looking more at Ulquiorra than her own hair. His look of concentration, emotionless, still, but still it made her blush slightly, she began shaking, becoming so flustered with herself.

"On'na, stop moving." Ulquiorra demanded in his signature flat tone. After days and days of asking, Ulquiorra finally gave into the others constant pleading for him to braid her hair. She remembered how nice it looked when he'd braided Rukia's once, and she couldn't help but want him to braid her's too.

"Y-yes, sorry." She said, her face becoming a deeper shade of pink, but she forced herself to remain still. "I'm just happy that you finally agreed to do it!" she set the mirror down in her lab as he finished her hair. "There, I am finished." he said walking around her to take a good look at her for himself. He nodded in approval, then about-faced and walked out of their bedroom.

"Wait!" she called after him. In response he backed into the room, "Yes? Something wrong On'na?" he asked blinking a couple of times. "No, I just wanted to say … Thank you." she said, a content expression on her face. "You're welcome." came the abrupt response, followed by him exiting once more. She sighed happily and pushed herself up from the bed that they'd both been sitting on. Grabbing her clips off her dresser and placing them on her collar. She tugged on her bangs until they were in perfect place. "Okay! I'm ready!" she squeaked to herself before trotting out of the room.

She looked at the clock that sat on her living room wall, reading 06:45 she gasped, "Oh no, I'm going to be late if I don't hurry!" grabbing her bag off the floor she felt her stomach rumble, which caused her to stand up straight in shock. "Ne, I don't think I'll have any time to eat something. Oh well, I'll have to go without it for today." she threw her bag over her shoulder and ran towards the door. Only to be stopped by the sound of Ulquiorra's voice.

"You're not going to eat anything?" he asked entering the room from the kitchen, his face showing little to no concern. "Well, I can't be late for school, and look, it's 6:46" she said pointing at the clock.

"I thought you didn't have to be to school until 7:40." his voice flat, he didn't understand how she was going to be late if she had just under an hour. It wasn't like her school was in a whole different town.

"Yeah but- I just have to go Ulquiorra-kun!" she whined, in truth, she tried to use the time as an excuse to not have to eat. She just wasn't hungry, and she knew that Ulquiorra was going to make her eat. "Aren't you at least going to take a bento?" he asked, his voice actually showing some sort of suspicion towards the girl.

"I'll buy something from school!" she said, wasting no time in opening the door and stepping out, closing it behind her she quickly walked to the steps, before he had a chance to call her back.

Just as she reached the last step she realized. "Oh no, I left my money inside!" but she continued on. If she would've gone back inside, she was pretty sure she wouldn't have left until she was well fed and given an overstuffed bento to take to school with her.

* * *

"Where in hell are my glasses?" Uryu shouted through the house, his face distraught. He had less than an hour to get to school and he was nowhere near ready. It didn't help that he couldn't find his glasses now all of a sudden.

Running back into the room that he now shared with Szayel, he noticed that his glasses had fallen under the bed somehow. He sighed in relief, running across the room he tripped over a box and fell straight to the floor, only succeeding in making more boxes fall. Crawling the rest of the way, he retrieved his glasses and fell over on his back, obviously in pain.

Attracted by the noise, Szayel poked his head in to see what happened. But when he didn't see anyone he just stood there, until he saw the Quincy's foot poking out from the side of the bed.

Heaving a sigh he walked over to where the other stood and loomed over him. "What are you doing?" he asked, obviously unamused.

"Well I was trying to get my glasses, when a bunch of perfectly places boxes were in the way." Uryu hissed, pushing himself off the floor, glaring at Szayel like it was his fault.

"Remember, you're the one that put them there, you didn't want me touching your stuff , so you put everything in there yourself." a smile twisted onto Szayels face as Uryu's fell. He mumbled something under his breath before pushing past the pink haired man, his eyes narrowed. He stood in the door frame and glared at the other, "Do you mind, I'm trying to get dressed for school."

"No, I don't mind," Szayel mused as he sat on the edge of the bed. "Go right ahead, I'm not stopping you." he adjusted his glasses slightly. He had to admit they felt weird on his face, seeing that he was used to his hollow mask. He could've kept them, but Uryu insisted that he wore a pair of glasses that actually looked normal. But no matter, he still looked amazing.

"That meant get out you idiot!" Uryu shouted, his face flushing a shade of red. "I refuse to get dressed for school in front of you!" he crossed his arms, glaring at the other. There was no well in hell was going to let the other watch him get dressed. He would be too flustered with himself the entire time, and he was bound to do something stupid.

"But I want to watch you~" Szayel mused, crossing one leg over the other, flipping his bangs out of his face. He placed both hands on his knees and chuckled. "So come on, you don't want to be late for school do you, Quincy~?"

Uryu grumbled something under his breath before dragging himself over to where Szayel sat, his uniform conveniently placed right next to where the other was sitting. He snatched it in his hands and took it off the hanger it was on.

"Aren't you going to take off those clothes first? Unless you feel like being particularly hot today~" Szayel chuckled, knowing that he must've been getting to the other.

Another string of incoherent profanities escaped the Quincy's mouth as he dropped the clothes back on the bed and proceeded to removing the clothes he'd slept in.

Once he was reduced to only being in his underclothes, he looked at the other to see that he was being stared at with one of the creepiest looks ever given. "S-Szayel do you mind?" he shouted, his face redder than before. Wasting little to no time at all he pulled on his school slacks. He'd rather be shirtless in front of the other rather than having anything below his midriff exposed.

Szayel chuckled, shaking his head he stood from the bed and began to exit the room. "How cute." he mused to himself, loud enough for the other to hear. Which resulted in him yelling something back at him.

_I'm not going to make it through the week with him here._

* * *

After Uryu was gone, Szayel had found himself laying on the couch in the living room, trying to force himself to watch daytime television.

He couldn't even make it a half hour without shutting the tv off. "Humans, strange creatures that I'll never understand." he mumbled, pushing himself up from the couch. When a perfectly timed knock came at the door. Pushing the glasses up that dared to fall off his face, he raised an eyebrow. "I wonder who this is.….." he asked himself. Making his way over to the door he opened it to see some random woman looking back at him.

"Um, how may I help you?" Szayel asked, to which the woman only responded with a slight blush

"E-erm hello there, my name is Miyuki and I am your neighbor, I just want to say hello seeing that we are going to be living next door to each other now!" she smiled, "Oh, and I made this!" she presented a plastic container, "they are mini cakes, I work at a bakery so I make them myself time to time."

"Oh I see, well my name is Szayel Aporro." Szayel responded, taking the container from her. "And my boyfriend isn't home right now, but he's Uryu."

The girls face fell at the mentioning of Uryu, but she quickly played it off with a smile. "Well I can't wait to meet him! In the mean time, I should get going, I don't want to keep you.." and with that she bowed and turned to scurry away.

Turning back towards the appartment and closing the door with his foot. Szayel chuckled, humans were so interesting sometimes. He moved over to the kitchen and set the container down on the table. Sighing he sat down in one of the two chairs that sat at his table, letting his face be held in his hand. He eyed the small container and he could only help but look disgusted with what was on the inside. There was nothing he hated more than vanilla, unless of course it was ice cream. But he hated the way the frosting tasted. He was more of a chocolate person. Which was funny to him because Uryu loved Vanilla.

"I guess he can eat all of those then, I have no intentions to even touch them." he said to himself, half hoping at there was someone there to share his boredom. He heard another sound at the door, so well timed people were today. Pushing himself up once more he went back to the door. Opening his face fell.

"What do you two want?" Szayel asked, being faced with none other than Ulquiorra and Grimmjow.

"Doesn't matter what the fuck we want pinky, just know that we're here alright?" Grimmjow spat as he pushed past the pink haired man and entered his house, Ulquiorra casually sliding past as well.

"Can I come in is a very useful and polite term that can be used Grimmjow." Szayel rolled his eyes, adjusting his glasses that were knocked out of line on his face.

"Fuck that, I do what I want." Grimmjow made a bee-line for the kitchen, almost ripping the door off the fridge when he opened it. "Holy hell where's all your food?" Grimmjow growled, a bit upset since he had yet to eat anything. Fucking Ichigo.

"I haven't been in this house a whole two days, what makes you think I would have a fully stocked refrigerator?" Szayel asked entering the kitchen, along with Ulquiorra who had kept silent, but was obviously annoyed with how obnoxious Grimmjow was being.

The blue haired mans eyes scanned the room, until they fell on the small container that sat in the dead center of the kitchen table. "Oh… what's this?" he asked picking the container up in his hands and ripping the lid off. The aroma of Vanilla making him sigh in delight, Szayel only shaking his head. "Don't touch those Grimmjow, they're fo-" before he could even finish, Grimmjow had stuck his hand in the container and taken one out, eating it whole. "Mn, these are good." he took another and another and another until he dropped the container on the floor. "Well, now I need something to wash that down with."

Ulquiorra just sat there, looking at Szayel, who looked as if he was about to re-make the hole in Grimmjow's abdomen. But Grimmjow was too busy in the former Octava's fridge, "Oh.. What's this?" he said pulling out a bottle that contained an orange liquid. .. Szayel's eyes widened, "Grimmjow, do not drink that. I am serious." he said, although it would've been more than amusing to watchh the results. He knew he'd never hear the end of it if the other was to drink it.

"Che, fuck off Szayel, like I said… I do what I want." and with that, Grimmjow opened the bottle and downed its contents. Szayel's hand flew to his face and he shook his head. "Imbecile! Do you even know what that was?" Szayel resisted the urge to just slap the other as if it would give him some intelligence. That was obviously needed.

"That was a diluted acid you just drank Grimmjow, and the effects make your mood change drastically." Szayel said, "You drank the entire bottle, which is more than the original dosage. In a nutshell, you're going to have drastic mood swings for the rest of the day, or week even!" Szayel shouted at him, really wanting to just, just kill him. He just basically gave himself the mood stability of a woman who'd been pregnant for 11 months.

"WHAT! WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT YOU FUCKING PINK HAIRED FUCKING BITCH ASS BASTARD!" Grimmjow shouted, throwing the bottle on the floor where it shattered into about twenty pieces. "THIS IS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT!"

"No, its your fault for drinking it Grimmjow, you shouldn't raid other people's homes in such a rude manner." Ulquiorra stated simply, looking at the other with a blank expression.

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK I SHOULD AND SHOULDN'T DO YOU FUCKING NON-EMOTIONAL BITCH" Grimmjow shouted once more, his arms flailing in the air.

"Well, I'm never going to hear the end of this." Szayel shrugged as he slumped into the table next to Ulquiorra as they watched Grimmjow pace the room, glass shattering under his feet, as he mumbled incoherent obscurities under his breath.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!" Grimmjow shouted before he turned to glare at Szayel. "You… YOU DID THIS TO ME!" he stomped over to the scientist and grabbed him by his collar, lifting him from his seat and putting them at eye level.

"Now now Grimmjow," Szayel said as a grin made its way to his porcelain features, "You're the one who decided to not heed my warning and drink the contents of that bottle, it was your own stubborn personality that caused this to happen to you." Grimmjow only glared back, wanting to just throw the other and see where he landed on how badly he got hurt. But something told him that not only Ichigo would be giving him hell about it later, but so would four-eyes.

And even if they didn't some hidden fear lurked in the back of Grimmjow's mind, a fear that all the Espada had for the Scientist. He may have not been strong, but he was damn sure smart as hell, and that intelligence, mixed with that creepy personality, was enough to scare anyone shitless. Hell, Grimmjow was wondering what the Quincy saw in this bastard anyways.

Dropping him, Grimmjow only glared, and glared. His blue orbs not leaving the others face, not even to glance over at Ulquiorra who seemed to be enjoying himself. It would've been easier to tell he would smile every once in a while.

"Che, whatever you fucking bastard I don't need this shit. I have more important things that I need to attend to right about now. So you two fuckers can fuck the fuck off." he growled, sounding rather stupid, but he didn't care. He was fucking Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez, and if he didn't want to put up with this shit that was going on around him. He didn't fucking have to, dammit.

"Grimmjow, language, I don't think anyone is in the mood for so many profane words so early on in the day~" Szayel mused, slinking back into the chair once again. Ulquiorra only watching, a faint smile on his pale face.

"Fuck you Szayel, fuck you okay? I don't fucking need you telling me what the fuck I can and cannot do. I do what the fuck I want understand?" he growled, crossing his arms over his chest. Trying to give off that 'bad-ass' vibe.

"Ah yes, I understand all too well. But tell me, isn't that 'I do whatever the fuck I want' attitude what go you in this predicament in the first place?" Szayel pointed out, which only resulted in Grimmjow turning and lunging at him.

Knocking the former Ocatva- along with the chair and himself- down to the floor, Grimmjow deadlocked him against the tile. "You want a fucking piece of me Pinky?" he shouted in the others face.

"No no, I am with Uryu if you do not mind. Besides, someone like you, isn't really my type. I prefer the intellectual kind~" Szayel mused, only further irritating the former Sexta.

"You know what Szayel, you're about five seconds away from me ripping your fucking head off and making your Quincy boyfriend eat it." he said in a lower, harsher tone. But still not getting any sort of reaction out of the other.

"Oh my, I am so afraid~ Ulquiorra! Save me!" Szayel mocked a damsel in distress tone, and he actually made Ulquiorra chuckle slightly. Only further pissing off Grimmjow.

"Fuck this!" he said pushing himself off the other, and standing once more, not caring if he'd left a mess in the man's kitchen, he walked towards the door.

"And where might you be going, Grimmjow? Have you drunken your fill in fun for today? Because your mood should be changing any moment now~" Szayel called to him, in a more than sweet tone.

"Fuck you Pinky, I'm going to the fucking school to fuck with Ichigo, I need to do something about my frustration." he said before slamming the door shut.

"Oh? That sounds like fun~" Szayel thought aloud, turning to Ulquiorra who was still far too amused by what just went down, Szayel had the face of a scientist with an Idea. "Why don't we tag along? It should prove to be a rather interesting endeavor do you not agree?"

Ulquiorra didn't really respond, he just stood and nodded. Following the Pink haired man towards the door to catch up with Grimmjow.

* * *

"I'm surprised you dick faces decided to join me." Grimmjow huffed as he and the two other former Espada walked along the streets of Karakura. They almost resembled a gang, in the formation that they stood in. Grimmjow in the middle, with Ulquiorra on the left and Szayel on the right. They could hear the comments of the young women that also walked the streets. And the insults that came from the men who were most likely jealous of them. But not one of them even bothered to acknowledge any one of them.

"Well, it sounded rather interesting, and I can't just turn down an opportunity like this Grimmjow~" Szayel mused, adjusting the glasses that just wouldn't stop falling down on his face. If it wasn't for Uryuu, he'd be wearing his other glasses, the ones that actually felt comfortable on his face. And not these pink catastrophe's that the Quincy called 'attractive'.

"I'm only going along because On'na told me I should get out more when she is not home." Ulquiorra commented lowly. He wasn't too fond of being around Grimmjow, but if Szayel would continue to mess with him like this, then why not go along to witness it?

"Well whatever the fuck the reason is, just don't do anything stupid to blow our cover, got it?" Grimmjow huffed. Szayel and Ulquiorra both stopped simultaneously, looking at Grimmjow with a displeased look. He turned to face them. "What?" was the only thing to escape his lips.

"Us? Blow our cover, I think you should've directed that statement towards yourself." Ulquiorra said, Szayel nodding in agreement. "Yes, I do conquer with Ulquiorra, seeing that out of the three of us, you're the least intelligent."

"Oh shut the fuck up!" Grimmjow rolled his eyes and turned to walk on once more, as did the others.

A few moments passed before the destination of choice came into view. A grin made its way to Grimmjow's face, as well as Szayel's. As for Ulquiorra, his face remained as stolid as could be.

"Something tells me that we should step out of our Gigais, ne?" Szayel mused as they made their way up to the gate that surrounded the school.

"Yeah, you're right. But where are we going to put them pinky?" Grimmjow asked, looking around, trying to hide somewhere to store their Gigais.

"How about behind one of the bushes up against the inside of the gate. I doubt anyone will look there." Ulquiorra suggested, his face still flat as could be.

"Ah, that could work!" Grimmjow said as the three commenced to hopping over the schools gate to avoid coming in contact with the guard that was there. It was an easy feat for any arrancar, and the trio did it with ease, landing without even the slightest of sounds.

Quickly removing themselves from their Gigais before they could be spotted, once again in their standard black and white Espada uniforms. The three began to stroll casually through the schools empty grounds.

"They must all be in class~" Szayel chuckled. "Why not cause them some grief?"

"I was only coming here to fuck with Ichigo, but fucking with everyone in the school is an even better idea. Nice fucking thinking Pinky!" Grimmjow said, slapping the other rather hard on the back, his way of showing 'affection'.

"Don't mention it." Szayel said as he rolled his arms back, trying to shake off the slight sting he'd received from the slap to his back.

"Well, time to fuck shit up. But to do this better, lets split up, and maybe then we can cause more mayhem! HAHAHA" and with that, Grimmjow and his loud voice were gone. Leaving only Ulquiorra and Szayel.

"I think if we stick together, we can cause twice as much damage, without getting caught. Don't you think?" Ulquiorra suggested. "Ahh, I think you're right Ulquiorra, and since Grimmjow will be first to get caught. He just may shield all the blame away from us.."

A smirk- one that was almost invisible- appeared on the face of Ulquiorra. "Yes, this will not only be to toy with the lowly humans that attend this establishment. But also to torment Grimmjow when he gets caught and we get off with a clean slate."

Szayel looked over at Ulquiorra, eyes wide. Did the other have some kind of dark side that nobody else knew about? Either way a smile made its way to Szayel's face as well, a full and genuine smile at the thought of Grimmjow's soon to come troubles.

"Yes.. This should be quite the Monday, and humans say that it is the worst day of the week…."

And with that.. The two were off.

* * *

**-Chapter two End- **


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